theredheadsaid


01
Sep 10

This is a sculpture with tension

That phrase popped into my head when I first saw this statue in Central Park.

That phrase probably doesn’t mean anything to you, but it’s something that was said a lot when I was an art major back in college.

When I looked at this statue, I suddenly had flashbacks of medieval oil masters and the flame-maned horses, always threatening to catapult their riders off the painting’s edge. It was always in battle scenes (I suppose who could afford to hire artists but the conquering emperors!)

It’s been a long time since I’ve enjoyed art. I almost went to a dedicated art college. But i ended up going to a regular college. I vacillated back and forth between journalism and art majors for years, finally graduating with a journalism major (I had to pick which had the most credits), but art has never been far from my heart. But I’ve never really allowed myself to do art- officially. It’s been more…craft. I was always the person who made you a homemade gift for Christmas (when I was young it was because of money), but now it’s because I think it’s so much more personal.

Well, now that NabloPoMo has chosen ART as the September theme, I thought now would be an excellent time to re-establish my relationship with art. Or at least explore how I feel about it now.


18
Aug 10

John Lennon on Facebook


17
Aug 10

If Robert Moses Were on Facebook


14
Aug 10

Bookiness! Drawing Lab

First I started drawing monsters. That was so much fun, on a recent date we played drawing games. I wanted more!  Then I found this book!

It’s just what it says: drawing exercises to flex your right hemisphere! I’m very excited to try it out. Will post my experiments (if they are any good!)


03
Aug 10

Monster Documentarian

I’ve started documenting monsters in New York. Check them out at the tumblr, newyorkmonsters.tumblr.com.


03
Aug 10

New York Random Meet Story #11

I go to Max Brenner to meet my friends @amyvernon and @cozywallet for some noms. Dahlia has brought her friend David, CEO of Postling. An hour in, two other ladies arrive, one is David’s girlfriend, the other is Jenn. We ask the usual questions about what we do, and somehow i get to talking about how i make custom cakes for my friends on their birthdays. I mention the nipple cake i made for a friend who was afraid of boobies.
“Wow!” Jenn says, i have a friend that cake would be perfect for! He’s an author and was raised an evangelical Christian and is scared of boobs.”
“That’s funny,” i say, “because i think i DID make the cake for your friend. Are you talking about Dave Dickerson?”
Sure enough, she was!
And then we both immediately texted him.


03
Aug 10

Guess what? It’s normal for “difficult conversations” to crash and burn


I’ve been realizing in the past year that being brought up in the house of Ultimate Seriousness and Non-talking has really left me with stunted negotiation skills. And I really want to learn how to better communicate and negotiate with people, both in relationships and at work.

So who appears in my life? Eyal, a conflict resolution specialist who needs a website. We’re doing a barter arrangement: I build his site, and he’s teaching me what he knows about “having difficult conversations.” I am always pleased how the universe sends me people exactly when I need them.

The important thing isn’t bringing up the issues.

We all know the basics of bringing up “issues.” We’re supposed to state the issue or behavior, and how it affected us, using “I” language whenever possible and not accusing or blaming. I think most of us do an adequate, if sometimes clumsy job of bringing up issues (or maybe that’s just me).

But what if you bring up your problem, and the conversation doesn’t seem to be going the way you hoped?

Eyal says “Having a conversation almost NEVER get results the first time you bring it up.”

THIS WAS THE MOST EXCITING THING I HAD EVER HEARD.

Again, being from the house of non-communication, I had been trying to have difficult talks with people, and if after the first attempt they weren’t productive, I either got flustered (thinking I didn’t say it right or something) or just gave up, thinking it was futile. This has made me feel SO MUCH BETTER. Ok, then I need to ask…

So what are you supposed to do if things don’t go the way you hoped?

Continue reading →


27
Jul 10

Probe Your Darkness

I’ve been devouring this great ebook from this guy I found on Twitter called Scott Ginsberg. His thing is that he ALWAYS wears a nametag. I haven’t read enough on his website to find out where that came from, but he has written a killer of a book. It’s got 159 pages of stuff for you to analyze, think about, challenge yourself with. And it’s all FREE RIGHT HERE. Today, I’m thinking about Probe your darkness.

Probe your darkness.

If you dare, that is. If you’re willing to come face to face with the ugliness
that is your Truth. If you’re willing to open the door to yourself and see
who the hell you really are. If you’re willing to make friends with all aspects
of yourself. Like my yoga instructor also says, “Look at yourself in the
mirror non-judgmentally. As a reflection and nothing else.”

The challenge is to develop a working relationship with your screw-ups. It’s
not easy but necessary; not fun but fundamental, and not comfortable but
constructive.

The good news is, once you open the door to your imperfect nature and
remove that which blocks the path of truth, the selfhood on which you
stand will support you.

And you’ll live from the place where nobody can touch you.
  • What shadowy parts of your life are you withholding?

  • Have you made friends with all aspects of yourself?

  • And do you have the courage and ability to show yourself as you truly are?


24
Jul 10

Inception: the beautiful mind f*ck movie

A friend asked me before I went to see Inception, “Why are you so excited to see this movie?”

My answer: it looks like a mind fuck.

A “mind fuck” movie is one that treats the audience as intelligent, and creates puzzles that we can either solve, or are slowly solved as the movie goes on. But there is no pandering, no overexplaining of plot. In a really good mind fuck movie, the movie contains enough ambiguity that the plot can be imagined a number of different ways. So when you leave the theater, you’re still chewing on it.  I love having a “what the fuck happened?” moment. Much like the Ben moments on Lost.

Inception turned out to be all that. After I saw the movie, I immediately called up a few friends to compare theories, and after that dove onto the Internet to see what other people thought. At first, the comments were just OH MY GOD. But then, the theories started emerging. Let’s go over some of them!

WARNING SUPER SPOILERS APPROACHING!!! TURN AWAY IF YOU HAVEN”T SEEN THE MOVIE!!

Continue reading →


23
Jul 10

Exit the middle

I’m not the type to write inspirational posts, but here’s my first one, so be gentle.

It was a few weeks ago that I read the post from Havi Brooks, called Exit the Middle.

She relates the middle to yoga practice, and the gist is this: in yoga (and life) there are beginners, those in the middle, and advanced. If you’re a beginner, everything is new, and still a challenge. Those advanced know what is going on, and how to create challenges for themselves, and also when to rest. More on the middle:

It’s the people who want you to challenge them instead of finding new ways to challenge themselves. Or it’s the people who want you to tone it down, instead of giving themselves permission to do less.

In business, the middle is filled with people looking outward to find out what more biggified people do, instead of inward to find out what is theirs.

Instead of innovating and making (or playing with what’s there in order to make it your own), the middle copies what already exists.

In the middle is all this wanting to be there already. It is not fun, being in the middle.

The tragic irony: no one is keeping you there.

Most people think the middle is where you are until you get good. No. The middle is where you stay until you decide to be conscious.

Staying in the middle means being cut off from your sovereignty.

In the middle, you need other people to show you what to do. You’re constantly waiting for other people to deliver. And constantly disappointed when what they give you doesn’t live up to your expectations.

Once you step out of the middle, you get to make conscious decisions about what appeals to you and what you’re willing to try.

But the tragedy of the middle is that there is nothing keeping anyone there.

Reading that really hit me.

I’m in the middle. I’ve been in the middle for YEARS.

I’m the person always trying new things, going places. I’ve now lived on both coasts and  few places in the middle. I’ve changed jobs numerous times, dated lots of people, and done zillions of hobbies. I thought it was because of the challenge, and partly, it is.

I’m in the thrill of beginner mind, where everything is a challenge. But as soon as I thought I had gotten a handle on whatever I was doing, i lost interest, and moved on to the next shiny thing.
But i think maybe I was afraid of the middle.

Afraid of making challenges for myself. Of really not knowing how.

Continue reading →