Jokes for your amusement

25 Apr

What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.
A Latin scholar walks into a bar and says, “I’ll have a martinus.” The bartender asks him. “Don’t you mean martini?” The man tells the bartender, “Listen, if I wanted two or more drinks I would have asked for them.”
René Descartes is in a bar at closing time. The bartender asks him if he’d like another drink. Descartes says, “I think not,” and he disappears.
A guy walks into a bar in Cork, in Ireland, and asks the barman: “What’s the quickest way to get to Dublin?” “Are you walking or driving?” asks the barman. “Driving,” says a man. “That’s the quickest way,” says the barman.
A young Texan walks into a bar and orders a drink. “Got any ID?” asks the bartender. The Texan replies, “About what?”